The tinted venus

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TheProjectGutenbergEBookofTheTintedVenus,byF Anstey ThiseBookisfortheuseofanyoneanywhereatnocostandwith almostnorestrictionswhatsoever Youmaycopyit,giveitawayor re-useitunderthetermsoftheProjectGutenbergLicenseincluded withthiseBookoronlineatwww.gutenberg.org Title:TheTintedVenus AFarcicalRomance Author:F Anstey Illustrator:BernardPartridge ReleaseDate:January7,2008[EBook#24197] Language:English ***STARTOFTHISPROJECTGUTENBERGEBOOKTHETINTEDVENUS*** ProducedbyDavidClarke,AnnieMcGuireandtheOnline DistributedProofreadingTeamathttp://www.pgdp.net(This filewasproducedfromimagesgenerouslymadeavailable byTheInternetArchive/CanadianLibraries) THETINTEDVENUS AFarcicalRomance BY F ANSTEY AUTHOROF "THEGIANT'SROBE,""VICEVERSÂ,"ETC ILLUSTRATEDBYBERNARDPARTRIDGE NEWYORKANDLONDON HARPERANDBROTHERS 1898 "Toyou, Freeandingeniousspirits,hedothnow Inme,presenthisservice,withhisvow He hath done his best; and, though he cannot glory Inhisinvention(thisworkbeingastory Ofreverendantiquity),hedothhope Intheproportionofit,andthescope, Youmayobservesomepiecesdrawnlikeone Ofasteadfasthand;andwiththewhiterstone To be marked in your fair censures More than this Iamforbidtopromise." MASSINGER CONTENTS I II III IV V VI VII VIII IX X XI XII XIII XIV XV INPURSUITOFPLEASURE PLEASUREINPURSUIT ADISTINGUISHEDSTRANGER FROMBADTOWORSE ANEXPERIMENT TWOARECOMPANY AFURTHERPREDICAMENT BETWEENTHEDEVILANDTHEDEEPSEA ATLAST DAMOCLESDINESOUT DENOUNCED ANAPPEAL THELASTSTRAW THETHIRTEENTHTRUMP THEODDTRICK LISTOFILLUSTRATIONS "THERE,"HESAIDTRIUMPHANTLY,"ITMIGHTHAVEBEENMADEFORHER!" "ANSWERME,"HESAIDROUGHLY;"ISTHISSOMELARKOFYOURS?" "DIDYOUWANTTOSEEMEON—ONBUSINESS,MUM?" "WHATWOULDBEDONETOHIM?"ASKEDTHEHAIRDRESSER,WITHAQUITEUNPLEASANT INTERNALSENSATION "KEEPOFF!TELLHERTODROPIT,TWEDDLE!" "IT IS A MISERABLE THING," HE WAS THINKING, "FOR A MAN TO HAVE A FEMALE STATUETROTTINGAFTERHIMLIKEAGREATDORG" SHEWASSTANDINGBEFORETHELOWCHIMNEY-GLASS,REGARDINGHERSELFINTENTLY "FOR'ARFAPINTI'DKNOCKYOURBLOOMIN''EDIN!" "WHYDIDYOUNOTKNEELTOMEBEFORE?" SHESTRUCKANAMELESSFEARINTOLEANDER'SSOUL HERHANDSWEREUNSTEADYWITHPASSIONASSHETIEDHERBONNET-STRINGS LEANDERWENTDOWNONALLFOURSONTHEHEARTH-RUG "STOPWHEREYOUARE! FORMERCY'SSAKE,DON'TCOMEIN!" "LEANDER!"SHECRIED, "IDON'TBELIEVESHECANDOIT!" HE THREW HIMSELF DOWN BY HERCHAIR, AND DREW DOWN THEHANDS IN WHICH SHE HADHIDDENHERFACE INPURSUITOFPLEASURE I "TherhoppedHawkyn, TherdaunsedDawkyn, ThertrumpedTomkyn " The Tournament of Tottenham InSouthamptonRow,Bloomsbury,thereisasmallalleyorpassageleadinginto QueenSquare,andrenderedinaccessibletoallbutfootpassengersbysomeiron posts Theshopsinthispassageareofasubduedexterior,andareovershadowed byadingyoldedificededicatedtoSt GeorgetheMartyr,whichseemstohave begunitsexistenceasaratherhandsomechapel,andtohaveimproveditself,by asortofevolution,intoasingularlyuglychurch Intothisalley,oneSaturdayafternoonlateinOctober,cameashortstoutyoung man, with sandy hair, and a perpetual grin denoting anticipation rather than enjoyment Opposite the church he stopped at a hairdresser's shop, which bore the name of Tweddle The display in the window was chastely severe; the conventional half-lady revolving slowly in fatuous self-satisfaction, and the gentlemanbearingapiebaldbeardwithwaxenresignation,werenottobefound inthisshop-front,whichexhibitednothingbutasmallpileoftoiletremediesand afewlengthsofhairofgraduatedtints Itwasdoubtful,perhaps,whethersuch self-restraint on the part of its proprietor was the result of a distaste for empty show,oraconvictionthattheneighbourhooddidnotexpectit Insidetheshoptherewasnobodybutasmallboy,corkingandlabellingbottles; butbeforehecouldansweranyquestionastothewhereaboutsofhisemployer, that artist made his appearance Leander Tweddle was about thirty, of middle height,withaluxuriantheadofbrownhair,andcarefully-trimmedwhiskersthat curled round towards his upper lip, where they spent themselves in a faint moustache His eyes were rather small, and his nose had a decided upward tendency; but, with his pink-and-white complexion and compact well-made figure,hewasfarfromill-looking,thoughhethoughthimselfevenfarther "Well, Jauncy," he said, after the first greetings, "so you haven't forgot our appointment?" "Why,no,"explainedhisfriend;"butIneverthoughtIshouldgetawayintime to keep it We've been in court all the morning with motions and short causes, andtheoldVicesaton tillpastthree;and when wedidgetbacktochambers, Splitter kep' me there discussing an opinion of his I couldn't agree with, and I waseversolongbeforeIgothimtoalteritmyway." For he was clerk to a barrister in good practice, and it was Jauncy's pride to discoveranoccasionalverbalslipinsomeofhisemployer'smorehastilywritten opinionsoncases,andsuggestimprovements "Well, James," said the hairdresser, "I don't know that I could have got away myself any earlier I've been so absorbed in the laborrit'ry, what with three rejuvenatorsandanelixirallonthesimmertogether,Ialmostgavewayunder thestrainofit;butthey'resettocoolnow,andI'mreadytogoassoonasyou please." "Now,"saidJauncy,briskly,astheylefttheshoptogether,"ifwe'retogetupto RosherwichGardensto-night,wemustn'tdawdle." "Ijustwanttolookinhereaminute,"saidTweddle,stoppingbeforethewindow ofaworking-jeweller,whosatthereinanarrowpartitionfacingthelight,witha greathornlensprotrudingfromoneofhiseyeslikeamonstrousgrowth "Ileft somethingtheretobealtered,andImayaswellseeifit'sdone." Apparentlyitwasdone,forhecameoutalmostimmediately,thrustingasmall cardboardboxintohispocketasherejoinedhisfriend "Nowwe'dbettertakea cabuptoFenchurchStreet,"saidJauncy "Can'tkeepthosegirlsstandingabout ontheplatform." Astheydrovealong,Tweddleobserved,"Ididn'tunderstandthatourpartywas toincludethefairsect,James?" "Didn'tyou?Ithoughtmylettersaidsoplainenough I'manengagedmannow, you know, Tweddle It wouldn't if I went out to enjoy myself and left my youngladyathome!" "No,"agreedLeanderTweddle,withamoraltwinge,"no,James I'dforgotyou wereengaged What'sthelady'sname,by-the-by?" "Parkinson;BellaParkinson,"wastheanswer Leanderhadturnedadeepercolour "Didyousay,"heasked,lookingoutofthe windowonhissideofthehansom,"thattherewasanotherladygoingdown?" "OnlyBella'ssister,Ada She'saregularjollygirl,Adais,you'll——Hullo!" ForTweddlehadsuddenlythrusthisstickupthetrapandstoppedthecab "I'm verysorry,James,"hesaid,preparingtogetout,"but—butyou'llhavetoexcuse mebeingofyourcompany." "Do you mean that my Bella and her sister are not good enough company for you?" demanded Jauncy "You were a shop-assistant yourself, Tweddle, only a shortwhileago!" "Iknowthat,James,Iknow;anditisn'tthat—farfromit I'msuretheyaretwo as respectable girls, and quite the ladies in every respect, as I'd wish to meet Onlythefactis——" Thedriverwaslisteningthroughthetrap,andbeforeLeanderwouldsaymorehe toldhimtodriveontillfurtherorders,afterwhichhecontinued— "Thefactis—wehaven'tmetforsolongthatIdaresayyou'reunawareofit— butI'mengaged,James,too!" "Wishyoujoywithallmyheart,Tweddle;butwhatthen?" "Why," exclaimed Leander, "my Matilda (that's her name) is the dearest girl, James;butshe'smostuncommonpartickler,andIdon'tthinkshe'dlikemygoing toaplaceofopen-airentertainmentwherethere'sdancing—andI'llgetouthere, please!" "Gammon!"saidJauncy "Thatisn'tit,Tweddle;don'ttryandhumbugme You werereadyenoughtogojustnow You'veabetterreasonthanthat!" "James,I'lltellyouthetruth;Ihave Inearlierdays,James,Iusedconstantlyto be meeting Miss Parkinson and her sister in serciety, and I dare say I made myself so pleasant and agreeable (you know what a way that is of mine), that MissAda(notyourlady,ofcourse)mayhavethoughtImeantsomethingspecial byit,andthere'snosayingbutwhatitmighthavecomeintimetoourkeeping company,onlyIhappenedjustthentoseeMatilda,and—andIhaven'tbeennear theParkinsonseversince Soyoucanseeforyourselfthatameetingmightbe awkwardforallpartiesconcerned;andIreallymustgetout,James!" Jauncy forced him back "It's all nonsense, Tweddle," he said, "you can't back outofitnow!Don'tmakeafussaboutnothing Adadon'tlookasifshe'dbeen breakingherheartforyou!" "You never can tell with women," said the hairdresser, sententiously; "and meeting me sudden, and learning it could never be—no one can say how she mightn'ttakeit!" "Icallittoobad!"exclaimedJauncy "HerehaveIbeencountingonyoutomake theladiesenjoythemselves—forIhaven'tyourgiftofentertainingconversation, and don't pretend to it—and you go and leave me in the lurch, and spoil their eveningforthem!" "IfIthoughtIwasdoingthat——"saidLeander,hesitating "You are, you know you are!" persisted Jauncy, who was naturally anxious to avoidthereductionofhispartytosoinconvenientanumberasthree "And see here, Tweddle, you needn't say anything of your engagement unless youlike IgiveyoumywordIwon't,noteventoBella,ifyou'llonlycome!As toAda,shecantakecare ofherself, unlessI'mverymuchmistakeninher So comealong,likeagoodchap!" "Igivein,James;Igivein,"saidLeander "Apromiseisapromise,andyetIfeel somehow I'm doing wrong to go, and as if no good would come of it I indeed!" Andsohedidnotstopthecabasecondtime,andallowedhimselftobetaken without further protest to Fenchurch Street Station, on the platform of which theyfoundtheMissesParkinsonwaitingforthem MissBellaParkinson,theelderofthetwo,whowasemployedinalargetoyand fancygoodsestablishmentintheneighbourhoodofWestbourneGrove,wastall andslim,withpaleeyesandauburnhair Shehadsomeclaimstogoodlooks,in spiteofaslightlypastycomplexion,andalargeanddecidedlyunamiablemouth HersisterAdawasthemorepleasinginappearanceandmanner,abrunettewith largebrowneyes,animpertinentlittlenose,andabrillianthealthycolour She wasanassistanttoamillinerandbonnet-makerintheEdgwareRoad "She'smoreoftenlikethisthannot,"saidLeander "Dearme,sir;butthat'sveryserious Istherenothingthatgivesrelief?—alittle salvolatile,now?Doestheladycarrysmellingsalts?Ifnot,Icould——"And the chemist made an offer to come from behind his counter to examine the strangepatient "No," said Leander, hastily "Don't you trouble—you leave her to me I know howtomanageher Whenshe'srigidlikethis,shecan'tbeartobetakennotice of." He was wondering all the time how he was to get away with her, until the chemist,whoseemedatleastasanxiousforherdeparture,suggestedtheanswer: "I should imagine the poor lady would be best at home Shall I send out for a cab?"heasked "Yes,"saidLeander,gratefully;"bringahansom She'llcomeroundbetterinthe openair;"forhehadhisdoubtswhetherthestatuecouldbestowedinsideafourwheeler "I'llgomyself,"saidtheobligingman;"myassistant'sout Perhapstheladywill sitdowntillthecabcomes?" "Thanks," said Leander; "but when she's like this, she's been recommended to stand." Thechemistranoutbare-headed,toreturnpresentlywithacabandasmalltrain of interested observers He offered the statue his arm to the cab-door, an attentionwhichwasnaturallyignored "Weshallhavetocarryherthere,"saidLeander "Why, bless me, sir," said the chemist, as he helped to lift her, "she—she's surprisinglyheavy!" "Yes," gasped Leander, over her unconscious shoulder; "when she goes off in one of these sleeps, she does sleep very heavy"—an explanation which, if obscure,wasacceptedbytheotheraspartofthegeneralstrangenessofthecase On the threshold the chemist stopped again "I'd almost forgotten the ring," he said "I'lltakethat!"saidLeander "Excuse me," was the objection, "but I was to give it back to the lady herself HadInotbetterputitonherfinger,don'tyouthink?" "Areyouamarriedman?"askedLeander,grimly "Yes,"saidthechemist "Then,ifyou'lltakemyadvice,Iwouldn'tifIwasyou—ifyou'reatallanxious tokeepoutoftrouble You'dbettergivetheringtome,andIgiveyoumyword ofhonourasagentlemanthatI'llgiveitbacktoherassoonasevershe'swell enoughtoaskforit." Theotheradoptedtheadvice,and,amidstthesympathyofthebystanders,they gotthestatueintothecab "Whereto?"askedthemanthroughthetrap "Charing Cross," said Leander, at random; he ought the drive would give him timeforreflection "The'orspital,eh?"saidthecabman,anddroveoff,leavingthemildchemistto stareopen-mouthedonthepavementforamoment,andgobacktohisshopwith agrowingsensethathehadhadaveryunusualexperience NowthatLeanderwasaloneinthecabwiththestatue,whoseattituderequired space, and cramped him uncomfortably, he wondered more and more what he wastodowithit HecouldnotaffordtodriveaboutLondonforeverwithher; hedarednottakeherhome;andhewasafraidofbeingseenwithher! Allatonceheseemedtoseeawayoutofhisdifficulty Hisfirststepwastodo whathecould,intheconstantlyvaryinglight,toreducethestatuetoitsnormal state He removed the curls which had disfigured her classical brow, and, with hispocket-handkerchief,rubbedmostofthecolourfromherface;thenthecloak hadonlytobetornoff,andallthatcouldbetrayhimwasgone NearCharingCross,LeandertoldthedrivertotakehimdownParliamentStreet, andstopattheentrancetoScotlandYard;therethecabman,atLeander'srequest, descended,andstaredtofindhimhuddledupunderthegleamingpalearmsofa statue "Guv'nor,"heremarked,"thatwarn'tthefareItookup,I'lltakemydyingoath!" "It'sallright,"saidLeander "Now,ItellyouwhatIwantyoutodo:gostraight in through the archway, find a policeman, and say there's a gentleman in your cab that's found a valuable article that's been missing, and wants assistance in bringingitin I'lltakecareofthecab,andhere'sdoublefareforyourtrouble." "Andwuthit,too,"wasthecabman'scomment,ashedepartedonhismission "I thoughtitwasthedevilIwasadrivin',wewasthatdownontheorfside!" ItwasnopartofLeander'sprogrammetowaitforhisreturn;hethrewthecloak overhisarm,pocketedhisbeard,andslippedoutofthecabandacrosstheroad to a spot whence he could watch unseen And when he had seen the cabman comewithtwoconstables,hefeltassuredthathisburdenwas insafe handsat last,andreturnedtoSouthamptonRowasquicklyasthenexthansomhehailed couldtakehim He entered his house by the back entrance: it was unguarded; and although he listened long at the foot of the stairs, he heard nothing Had the Inspector not comeyet,orwasthereatrap?Ashewenton,hefanciedthereweresoundsin hissitting-room,andwentuptothedoorandlistenednervouslybeforeentering in "Oh,MissCollum,mypoordear!"atremulousvoice,whichherecognisedashis aunt's,wassaying,"forMercy'ssake,don'tlietherelikethat!She'sdying!—and it'smyfaultforlettinghercomehere!—andwhatamItosaytoherma?" Leanderhadheardenough;heburstin,withawhite,horror-strickenface Yes,it wastootrue!Matildawaslyingbackinhiscrazyarmchair,hereyesfastclosed, herlipsparted "Aunt,"hesaidwithdifficulty,"she'snot—notdead?" "If she is not," returned his aunt, "it's no thanks to you, Leandy Tweddle! Go away;youcandonogoodtohernow!" "NottillI'veheardherspeak,"criedTweddle "Tillie,don'tyouhear?—it'sme!" Tohisimmenserelief,sheopenedhereyesatthesoundofhisvoice,andturned away with a feeble gesture of fear and avoidance "You have come back!" she moaned,"andwithher!Oh,keepheraway! Ican'tbearitalloveragain! I can't!" Hethrewhimselfdownbyherchair,anddrewdownthehandsinwhichshehad hidden her face "Matilda, my poor, hardly-used darling!" he said, "I've come back alone! I've got rid of her, Tillie! I'm free; and there's no one to stand betweenusanymore!" HETHREWHIMSELFDOWNBYHERCHAIR,ANDDREWDOWNTHE HANDSINWHICHSHEHADHIDDENHERFACE HETHREWHIMSELFDOWNBYHERCHAIR,ANDDREWDOWN THEHANDSINWHICHSHEHADHIDDENHERFACE Shepushedbackherdisorderedfairhair,andlookedathimwithsweet,troubled eyes "But you went away with her—for ever?" she said "You said you didn't lovemeanylonger Iheardyou itwasjustbefore——"andsheshudderedat therecollection "Iknow,"saidLeander,soothingly "Iwasobligatedtospeakharsh,todeceive the—theotherparty,Tillie Itriedtotellyou,quiet-like,thatyouwasn'ttomind; butyouwouldn'ttakenonotice Butthere,wewon'ttalkaboutitanymore,so longasyouforgiveme;andyoudo,don'tyou?" She hid her face against his shoulder, in answer, from which he drew a favourableconclusion;butMissTweddlewasnotsoeasilypacified "And is this all the explanation you're going to give," she demanded, "for treating this poor child the way you've done, and neglecting her shameful like this?Ifshe'ssatisfied,Leandy,I'mnot." "I can't help it, aunt," he said "I've been true to Tillie all the way through, in spite of all appearances to the contrary—as she knows now And the more I explained, the less you'd understand about it; so we'll leave things where they are ButI'vegotbackthering,andnowyoushallseemeputitonherfinger." ItseemedthatLeanderhaddriventoScotlandYardjustintimetosavehimself, fortheInspectordidnotmakehisthreatenedsearchthatevening Twoorthreedayslater,however,toLeander'ssecretalarm,heenteredtheshop Afterall,hefelt,itwashopelesstothinkofdeceivingthesesleuth-houndsofthe Law: this detective had been making inquiries, and identified him as the man whohadsharedthehansomwiththatstatue! Hiskneestrembledashestoodbehindhisglass-toppedcounter "Cometomake thesearch,sir?"hesaid,ascheerfullyashecould "You'llfindusreadyforyou." "Well," said Inspector Bilbow, with a queer mixture of awkwardness and complacency, "no, not exactly Tweddle, my good fellow, circumstances have recentlyassumedashapethatrendersasearchunnecessary,asperhapsyouare aware?" He looked very hard at Tweddle as he spoke, and the hairdresser felt that this was a crucial moment—the detective was still uncertain whether he had been mixedupwiththeaffairornot Leander'sfacultyofreadywitservedhimbetter herethanonpastoccasions "Aware?No,sir!"hesaid,withadmirablesimplicity "Thenthat'swhyyoudidn't cometheotherevening!Isatupforyou,sir;allnightIsatup." "The fact of the matter is, Tweddle," said Bilbow, who had become suddenly affableandcondescending,"Ifoundmyselfreduced,sotospeak,tomakeuseof youasafalseclue,ifyoucatchmymeaning?" "Ican'tsayIdoquiteunderstand,sir." "I mean—of course, I saw with half an eye, bless your soul, that you'd had nothing to with it—it wasn't likely that a poor chap like you had any knowledgeofabigplantofthatdescription No,no;don'tyougoawaywiththat idea Ineverassociatedyouwithitforasingleinstant." "I'mtrulygladtohearit,Mr Inspector,"saidLeander "ItwasowingtothelineItookup Thereweretherealpartiestoputofftheir guard,andtodothat,Tweddle—todothat,itwasnecessarytoappeartosuspect you D'yesee?" "I think it was a little hard on me, sir," he said; "for being suspected like that hurtsaman'sfeelings,sir Ididfeelwoundedtohavethatcastupagainstme!" "Well,well,"saidtheInspector,"we'llgointothatlater But,togoonwithwhat I was saying My tactics, Tweddle, have been crowned with success—the famousVenusisnowsafeinmyhands!Whatdoyousaytothat?" "Say?Why,whatclevergentlemenyoudetectiveofficersare,tobesure!"cried Leander "Well, to be candid, there's not many in the Department that would have managedthejobasneatly;but,then,itwasacaseI'dgoneinto,andthoroughly gotup." "That I'm sure you must have done, sir," agreed Leander "How ever did you comeonit?"Hefeltakindofcuriositytoheartheanswer "Tweddle,"wasthesolemnreply,"thatisathingyoumustbecontenttoleavein its native mystery" (which Leander undoubtedly was) "We in the Criminal InvestigationDepartmenthaveoursecretchannelsandourundergroundsources for obtaining information, but to lay those channels and sources bare to the publicwouldservenousefulend,norwoulditbeanexpedientactonmypart All you have any claim to be told is, that, however costly and complicated, howeverdangerouseven,themeansemployedmayhavebeen(thatIsaynothing about),theultimateendhasbeenobtained TheVenus,sir,willberestoredtoher placeintheGalleryatWricklesmarshCourt,withoutascratchonher!" "Youdon'tsayso!Lor!"criedLeander,hopingthathiscountenancewouldkeep his secret, "well, there now! And my ring, sir, if you remember—isn't that on her?" "Youmustn'texpectustodoeverything Yourringwas,asIhadeveryreasonto expectitwouldbe,missing ButIshallbetalkingthematteroverwithSirPeter Purbecke, who's just come back to Wricklesmarsh from the Continent, and, provided—ahem!—youdon'tgotalkingaboutthisaffair,Ishouldfeeljustified inrecommendinghimtomakeyousomesubstantialacknowledgmentforany— well, little inconvenience you may have been put to on account of your slight connectionwiththebusiness,andthestepsImayhavethoughtpropertotakein consequence And,fromallIhearofSirPeter,Ithinkhewouldbeinclinedto comedownuncommonlyhandsome." "Well, Mr Inspector," said Leander, "all I can say is this: if Sir Peter was to know the life his statue has led me for the past few days, I think he'd say I deservedit—Ido,indeed!" CONCLUSION The narrow passage off Southampton Row is at present without a hairdresser's establishment,Leanderhavingresignedhisshop,longsince,infavourofeithera fruitererorastationer But,inoneoftheleadingWestEndthoroughfaresthereisalargeandprosperous hair-cuttingsaloon,overwhichthenameof"Tweddle"glittersresplendent,and the books of which would prove too much for Matilda, even if more domestic dutieshadnotbeguntoclaimherattention Leander'stroublesareatend ThankstoSirPeterPurbecke'smunificence,hehas made a fresh start; and, so far, Fortune has prospered him The devices he has invented for correcting Nature's more palpable errors in taste are becoming widelyknown,whileheisfamous,too,asthegiftedauthorofaseriesofbrilliant and popular hairwashes He is accustoming his clients to address him as "Professor"—a title which he has actually had conferred upon him from a quarterinwhichheis,perhaps,themosthighlyappreciated—forprosperityhas notexactlylessenedhisself-esteem Mr Jauncy, too, is a married man, although he does not respond so heartily to congratulations Thereisnointimacybetweenthetwohouseholds,theheadsof whichrecognisethat,asLeanderputsit,"theirwivesharmonisebetterapart." TothenewcollectionofCastsfromtheAntique,atSouthKensington,therehas been recently added one which appears in the official catalogue under the followingdescription:— "TheCythereanVenus.—Marblestatue FoundinagrottointheIslandofCerigo Now in the collection of Sir Peter Purbecke, at Wricklesmarsh Court, Blackheath "This noble work has been indifferently assigned to various periods; the most general opinion, however, pronounces it to be a copy of an earlier work of Alkamenes,orpossiblyKephisodotos "Theunusualsmallnessoftheextremitiesseemstobetraythehandofarestorer, andtherearetracesofcolourintheoriginalmarble,whicharesupposedtohave beenaddedatasomewhatlaterperiod." ShouldProfessorTweddleeverfindhimselfintheMuseumonaBankHoliday, and enter the new gallery, he could hardly avoid seeing the magnificent cast numbered333inthecatalogue,andrevivingtherebyrecollectionshehasalmost succeededinsuppressing But this is an experience he will probably spare himself; for he is known to entertain, on principle, very strong prejudices against sculpture, and more particularlytheAntique THEEND EndoftheProjectGutenbergEBookofTheTintedVenus,byF Anstey ***ENDOFTHISPROJECTGUTENBERGEBOOKTHETINTEDVENUS*** *****Thisfileshouldbenamed24197-h.htmor24197-h.zip***** Thisandallassociatedfilesofvariousformatswillbefoundin: http://www.gutenberg.org/2/4/1/9/24197/ ProducedbyDavidClarke,AnnieMcGuireandtheOnline DistributedProofreadingTeamathttp://www.pgdp.net(This filewasproducedfromimagesgenerouslymadeavailable byTheInternetArchive/CanadianLibraries) Updatededitionswillreplacethepreviousone theoldeditions willberenamed Creatingtheworksfrompublicdomainprinteditionsmeansthatno 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